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The Thought of the Week
by Georgie Márquez-André


September 26, 2005

Just Say No



DISCIPLINE, to prepare by instructing in correct principles and habits



One of the most shocking stories to come out of the horrific hurricane disasters have been those of looting, rapes, mayhem...

What is it that causes human beings to turn their backs on other hurting human beings and transform themselves into evil predators?

Maybe it is related to people's inability to say no... to others and to themselves...

When did the word “no” become a curse word?

We all know that for many children it is the first word they take ownership of; probably because it can be a very powerful word. When we say no, we are immediately surrounding ourselves with an invisible boundary. These boundaries can be good and healthy, as when we say no to things, or people that can hurt us, or they can be defiant and rebellious, as when we say no to our parents, or to God.

The key is distinguishing who or what should be left outside our “no” boundaries, and who or what should be allowed in.



Oftentimes, when teaching our children obedience and submission, we strip them of the power to exert self-control, or self-preservation. How many of us have been taught that it is not nice to say “no”?



I have a theory.

My theory is that we would all be better off if we practiced saying no to ourselves, consciously, at least once a day.

We are so good at saying yes... giving in to things we should turn away from. In effect, we tend to spoil ourselves, and as a result, end up lacking the discipline necessary for growth and maturity. Then, when the difficult times come, when hard choices are forced upon us, we come up short. Disciplining ourselves is a means of training.



TRAINING, teaching and forming by practice



Military men all over the world know that training is not easy, it is not fun, but it is essential. In their case, it might affect their very survival.

Another example, from a totally opposite extreme is musical training. Recently, I was reading an interview with a well known opera singer. She talked of practicing a particular piece to the point that her muscles would "remember" what to do when and if her emotions took over and she was overcome.

In the Book of Judges, the Lord tells the people that He left the Canaanites in the land, "so that the generations of the children of Israel might be taught to know war" (Judges 3:1-2).

We may not like hard times... we may not like having to go the extra mile... we may not like discomfort...

In the end, however, it is only by forcing ourselves to lift the heavier weights that makes our muscles get stronger... and saying "no" to ourselves... at least once a day... will enable us to make the right choice more often than not.



How do we prevent vandalism? Criminal activity?

More important, how do we teach people to choose wisely? To do the right thing?

Maybe if we teach our children self-discipline, to deny themselves, to put off immediate gratification... maybe learning to say "no" to ourselves in the face of temptations. Maybe...



As many agencies continue working to bring aid to those affected by both Katrina and Rita, please help them help others:

The Salvation Army, Operation Blessing, American Red Cross.



Have a blessed week.



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